Can’t sleep

Written by S

It’s 5.06am and I’ve just gotten home from a graveyard shift at work. Usually I wouldn’t finish until 6.00am but I was feeling a bit off so left early. Now that I’m home though, I don’t feel at all tired. I’ve got so much going through my head and it has only just dawned on me that this baby making game is going to be a really long one.

Of course I hope we’re one of those lucky couples that get pregnant within a couple of months, but the reality of it is that this will likely take a lot longer. Fertility treatments are going to be expensive and emotionally draining. Starting a family is something we have been planning for years now and something I’ve been wanting my entire life but I have looked so far forward that I’ve skipped over all the stuff that has to happen first. I guess I just wish we had some friends who have been through this process just so I knew what to expect. I sure hope we’re ready for it…

The ball is rolling

Written by S         

Yesterday afternoon we went to our first doctors appointment. I was pretty nervous in the hours leading up to it and as we sat waiting for my name to be called my palms were sweaty and I had a swarm of butterflies in my stomach. Dr Lesbian came out to the reception area and guided us into her office. She was instantly warm and inviting and I’m so grateful for that. Candice let her know that we want to start a family and require a referral to Queensland Fertility Group (QFG) from a GP.

This appointment could not have gone better. My suspicions that Dr Lesbian really was a lesbian were indeed true. Not only is she gay, she and her partner have 2 children of their own conceived through QFG. She whipped us up a referral and explained how the initial appointment will work. I can’t even explain how much better it was to hear all this from someone who has actually been through it. She told us that all the fertility doctors were lovely and they are completely fine with same sex couples.The only negative review she had was of the psychologist which whom Candice and I will have to see. It’s mandatory for anyone planning to use a sperm donor to see him and from what she said he isn’t very open to the idea of same sex parenting. So I’m already dreading that appointment. Her advice was to just nod and answer his questions calmly.
I will no doubt write a post and let you know what sort of questions we were asked and also how the session went in general.
Dr L sent me off to the QML Pathology for some pre-pregnancy blood tests. As QML were already shut after our doctors appointment, I went there on my own today. Sitting in the waiting room by myself, I started to feel a little nervous again. I’m a regular blood donor so it wasn’t because I was scared of the needle. It was just being alone in such a clinical environment. It made me realise how lucky I am that Candice is going to be with me through this. For every fertility appointment, for every insemination, for every ultrasound. I imagine doing it all alone would be pretty frightening.

Today I started taking Elevit vitamins. They contain all the good stuff a growing baby needs – folic acid, iodine, calcium, iron etc. Dr L says it’s good to start taking them a few months before as well as through a pregnancy.

So that’s where we are at right now. We still need to contact QFG to make our first appointment with the specialist so once we work out what date is going to work we will call the clinic later this week to book it.

Lovely to meet you

Written by S            


Hello, we’re Shauna and Candice. We’ve been together almost 7 years and are getting hitched next week in Queenstown, New Zealand – one of our favourite places. Residing in Queensland, Australia, we have decided to document our path towards starting our family together.

There are a number of same sex parenting blogs, however not a lot talk about the lead up to it all. Maybe our experiences will help others, maybe not. We just look forward to sharing the highs and lows of the rollercoaster ride that we’re about to board.

This is an unfamiliar path and we are really just figuring it out as we go. We are both 29, committed, healthy and ready.

It has been long decided that I will be carrying which I’m more than happy about. Candice can’t really imagine herself pregnant which is a good thing since due to medical reasons she is unable to anyway. However, because of that I do feel a little bit of anxiety about being unable to get pregnant. I work in a laboratory and I’m around a lot of nasty chemicals that can affect fertility and worry a bit that over the last 6 years maybe it’s impacted on my body. Candice jokes about it and says I will be as fertile as a bunny. None of the women in my family have ever had any trouble so fingers crossed I won’t either.

This blog will follow us on our first doctors appointment, choosing a sperm donor, fertility clinic appointments, disappointments and basically the whole pregnancy experience.

Today is Friday. We have booked in to see our local GP on Monday for our very first appointment. I feel a little nervous about it for a few reasons. I don’t love doctor appointments to start with but on top of that, I’m worried about being judged by an unfriendly or homophobic doctor. Due to the fact that I never see a doctor when I get sick, I don’t really have one. When I made the call to the clinic I asked to see one of the female GPs specialising in family planning. As luck would have it, I think our doctor is gay. Now I’m not saying that my gaydar is 100% fool proof. I’ve been wrong many times before but I have a strong feeling she might be. Regardless, she looks super warm & friendly.

So Monday afternoon we are off to see if Dr Lesbian can help us 2 ladies make a baby. Stay tuned.