Toddler logic

I’m learning things at a rapid rate when it comes to the logic of a two-year old. Or shall I say, the lack of logic.

Oscar has taught me that there is simply a right way and a wrong way to do things and that if I am to survive these years with my sanity in tact, I must adapt quickly.

This all started happening just a few weeks before his second birthday. Suddenly if felt like I couldn’t do anything right. I was foolishly offering the green cup instead of the red cup. He would throw a tantrum when I told him it was time to have a bath but then he would throw an even bigger one when I told him that bath time was over. He got upset when he tipped water on his shirt, soaking the front but then lost it when I suggested we take it off to put a dry one on. I gave up and left him in the wet shirt.

Just this week I’ve learnt the correct way to prepare Oscar a banana. That’s right folks, who knew there was a right and wrong way. When he very politely requested one, I picked a banana up out of the fruit bowl and sliced it up onto a plate like I always do. Well, that was a BIG MISTAKE. He took one look at it and started running on the spot saying, “No, no, noooo”. Quite taken aback, I put the banana to the side and picked up another one. He held his arms up and I understood that he actually wanted the banana whole. Sure, I can do that. So naturally, I peel back the skin and offer him the whole skinless banana. Well. He dropped to his knees, covered his eyes and cried. My face was scrunched up in what can only be described as the ‘what the fuck’ look. My palms were getting sweaty as I desperately tried to work out what he wanted. So, once again I reached for the fruit bowl. This time I knelt down in front of him with the sacred fruit and he watched as I started peeling, before quickly reaching out and stopping me when it had been peeled about an inch. He happily skipped away, munching on the patly peeled banana. Luckily bananas grow on trees. I let out a sigh of relief, I had survived another lesson in toddler logic.

Day in, day out, these events are happening. I get it, he’s learning and finding his way. He’s fighting for a sense of independence. It’s all normal toddler behavior.

Meanwhile, I’m over here scratching my head, nervously trying to decide if I should offer him a spoon or fork with his dinner tonight. Yesterday he liked the spoon but today… who the hell knows.


The House of Sleep

It has now been exactly 3 weeks since we began our mission to get Oscar to sleep through the night. We’ve had so much success that I can still hardly believe it.

If you follow us on Instagram then you may have already read our update explaining how we were going about it. We researched gentle methods and tried to make it a simple enough plan so that we could easily follow through with it. The basic rules were to no longer give in to his night-time bottles (he has become quite dependent on several through the night) and to support him by being there in the room with him any time that he woke (patting, cuddling, reassuring him that we were there, etc). The change we’ve seen in such a short time has been amazing. He hasn’t had a bottle through the night in 3 weeks and is resettling himself quickly when he starts making stirring sounds.

We know at any point that teething or sickness could interrupt this new found sleep success but that okay. Of course he’s going to sleep badly when he’s feeling like rubbish, I know I do.

In addition to him sleeping through, Oscar is now eating a whole lot more during the day. He wakes up asking for breakfast before he’s even out of bed some days, which is unheard of around here. Meal time was always a struggle but now he’s eating a 3 course breakfast, lots of snacks through the day, a decent lunch and an okay dinner. I say an okay dinner because that’s the meal he’s least interested in. Some days he will still demolish a bowl of pasta and ask for more but often he won’t finish what we give him. It could be because it’s late in the day and he’s getting tired and grumpy. Perhaps by that point he’s just ready for his bath, his pre bed bottle and bedtime. Whatever the reason, we’re not worried.

We’re super proud of how far he has come in such a short time.

He’s talking more and more everyday and reading books is probably his favourite thing to do. Last night before his bedtime, he brought me 11 books and we read every single one. Some of them twice.

Candice and I watched a documentary on Netflix the other night called The Beginning of Life. I have such a genuine interest in child developement, especially the formative years and so much of this doco resonated with me. As I watched it, I was nodding along and mentally agreeing with so much. Babies and toddlers are amazing and I don’t believe that anything they do is pointless. They’re learning 24/7 and I find that so interesting.

After watching it, I realised that there are some areas that I would like to work on. The main one is expanding the range of words I use when I speak to and explain things to Oscar. I tend to dumb things down when talking to him. If I point out a boat to him, I call it a boat. If I point out a yacht to him, I call it a boat. If I point out a ship to him, I call it a boat. If I point out a canoe to him, you guessed it. I call it a boat. Often when speaking to him, I refer to the taste of things as ‘yummy’ instead of using words such as spicy, sweet, tangy. Everything is just ‘yummy’. I think it’s because I worry that I might confuse him but I really needn’t have those concerns. I don’t need to dumb things down for him. How is he ever going to learn these words if he never hears us speak them to him? Kids are so clever and over the next few years Oscar is going to be absorbing everything and 22 motnhs isn’t too young  to be hearing so many new words, its actually the perfect age.

In other news, we’ve decided to hold off on baby number two for about 6 months. One part of me feels disappointed but the overwhelming part of me feels more relaxed. Everything just clicks in and makes more sense to wait a little bit longer so that’s what we’re going to do!


Lovely to meet you

Written by S            


Hello, we’re Shauna and Candice. We’ve been together almost 7 years and are getting hitched next week in Queenstown, New Zealand – one of our favourite places. Residing in Queensland, Australia, we have decided to document our path towards starting our family together.

There are a number of same sex parenting blogs, however not a lot talk about the lead up to it all. Maybe our experiences will help others, maybe not. We just look forward to sharing the highs and lows of the rollercoaster ride that we’re about to board.

This is an unfamiliar path and we are really just figuring it out as we go. We are both 29, committed, healthy and ready.

It has been long decided that I will be carrying which I’m more than happy about. Candice can’t really imagine herself pregnant which is a good thing since due to medical reasons she is unable to anyway. However, because of that I do feel a little bit of anxiety about being unable to get pregnant. I work in a laboratory and I’m around a lot of nasty chemicals that can affect fertility and worry a bit that over the last 6 years maybe it’s impacted on my body. Candice jokes about it and says I will be as fertile as a bunny. None of the women in my family have ever had any trouble so fingers crossed I won’t either.

This blog will follow us on our first doctors appointment, choosing a sperm donor, fertility clinic appointments, disappointments and basically the whole pregnancy experience.

Today is Friday. We have booked in to see our local GP on Monday for our very first appointment. I feel a little nervous about it for a few reasons. I don’t love doctor appointments to start with but on top of that, I’m worried about being judged by an unfriendly or homophobic doctor. Due to the fact that I never see a doctor when I get sick, I don’t really have one. When I made the call to the clinic I asked to see one of the female GPs specialising in family planning. As luck would have it, I think our doctor is gay. Now I’m not saying that my gaydar is 100% fool proof. I’ve been wrong many times before but I have a strong feeling she might be. Regardless, she looks super warm & friendly.

So Monday afternoon we are off to see if Dr Lesbian can help us 2 ladies make a baby. Stay tuned.